songs that make me feel what i dont want to feel. (this one is a little long, but be patient and read all the words)

there are two songs that make me feel things that i don't want to feel, but i think they say everything that i cant seem to say. i keep my feelings to my self and when i hear these songs they let me know that everything will be ok and that i am not alone. i know that these songs might be seem to be a little sad and depressing, but i think we all have our days. i just think these two songs make me think about things in my life and what i want and don't want in my life. i hope they do the same for you also.
Whatever it takes
A strangled smile fell from your face What kills me that I hurt you this way The worst part is that I didn't even know Now there's a million reasons for you to go But if you can find a reason to stay
I'll do whatever it takes To turn this around I know that what's at stake I know that I've let you down And if you give me a chance Believe that I can change I'll keep us together whatever it takes
She said "If we're gonna make this work You gotta let me inside even though it hurts Don't hide the broken parts that I need to see"She said "Like it or not it's the way it's gotta be You gotta love yourself if you can ever love me"
I'll do whatever it takes To turn this around I know what's at stake I know that I've let you down And if you give me a chance And give me a break I'll keep us together, I know you deserve much better
But remember the time I told you the way that I felt That I'd be lost without you and never find myself Let's hold onto each other above everything else Start over, start over
I'll do whatever it takes To turn this around I know what's at stake I know I've let you down And if you give me a chance and believe that I can change I'll keep us together whatever it takes
Broken
The broken clock is a comfort, it helps me sleep tonight Maybe it can stop tomorrow from stealing all my time I am here still waiting though i still have my doubtsI am damaged at best, like you've already figured out
I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing With a broken heart that's still beating In the pain, there is healing In your name I find meaningSo I'm holdin' on, I'm holdin' on, I'm holdin' on barely holdin' on to you
The broken locks were a warning you got inside my head I tried my best to be guarded, I'm an open book instead I still see your reflection inside of my eyes That are looking for a purpose, they're still looking for life
I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing with a broken heart that's still beating In the pain (in the pain), there is healingIn your name (in your name) I find meaning So I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'), I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'), I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin')I'm barely holdin' on to you I'm hangin' on another dayJust to see what you throw my way And I'm hanging on to the words you sayYou said that I will be OK The broken lights on the freeway left me here alone I may have lost my way now, haven't forgotten my way home I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing with a broken heart that's still beating In the pain(In the pain) there is healing In your name I find meaning So I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'), I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'), I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'),I'm barely holdin' on to you I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'), I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'), I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'),I'm barely holdin' on to you

Good morning dear friends

i got up this morning feeling better than ever. i guess that short hospital stay did a lot for me. i got released from the hospital early because i told them that i would be able to give my self shots 2x a day for ten days. i thought that would be better than being in the hospital for another few days. i finally got a good nights sleep last night. i guess that's why i am up so early. do you know how good it felt to be back in my own bed? let me just say it felt very good. i guess that's enough rambling for know.
keep up with me-xoxoxo

on my-own and not loving it

people say that being alone for a while is a good thing, but i don't think it is for me. i am the kind of person who wants to share her heart with someone everyday and every night. i want to be wanted and i want to be loved. i think every woman wants the same thing from the right man. i know that i am loved by friends, family and god, but being loved by that one special man can just make life soo much better. i have been loved like that before and i have loved like that also and i must say that i miss it so much. i have really been hurt and i don't ever want to feel that kind of pain again. that is why i keep my heart closed until i can find or i know that i can trust that person with all i have. i know that might sound cold but i am a young woman who has been damaged and i don't want that to ever happen a again.
my heart is still open to the possibility to love, but the man just had to prove him self to me. i am bruised but i am not broken and think that a good thing. i am not looking for a man to fix me, but i am looking for one to help me believe in love again. i know that i will love again and i know that the pain from the past will go away i just have to take a chance and pray that i want get hurt. i have to pick myself up and try again, because if i don't i might just miss out on true love that is right in front of my face.
wish me luck-xoxoxo